to the moon, i love you
in the middle of window pain
the sad wind slaughters butterflies
as they leave your body
now not even a corpse will remains
but
seeing through that old glass …
inhale, exale,
whar did it mean?
i hope one day you’re looking around
you wonder where the wind blew
the purest heart
an old beloved…
your favorite violin sound
when the relentless love
your once most favored kiss…
nowhere to be found
why can’t you feel it?
say,
what will become of you
when you look the sky
but can no longer find the moon
it seems time has now met
it’s most stubborn enemy
even if i lost my step,
i’d stand up every time
you knocked me down
our 2 year waltz, our 2 year war
despite your arrogance
despite stubbornness
reject a temporary shield
or moments’ retreat
hey,
look at me
i’ve yet to fully resign
i cannot recede
see me?
perched on storm clouds
SEE ME?
with one hand hanging….
down,
HELP!
i’m slipping
still reaching now
screw me,
screw you
my brain’s vapid
and wishful thinking
screw that too
oh i’m dramatic?
how cute!
little fluid, stupid dreams
poor you!
but if he also held a sword
tell me,
how am i the only one
seen!
& indicted for these casualties?
sigh,
as i ask myself:
did i learn anything?
when pure naivety
still proves to be
a match for me?
silly, silly, silly
she falls victim every time
self-made fallacies
delusional deceiving…
my & your reflection
they question me
but applaud him
you hear me?
call me insane
you bear my brain?
maybe now you relate
do you whisper in her ear
between kisses
“you’re gorgeous” ?
is she exotic?
so thoughtful?
and never toxic?
is her mind so fascinating?
the girl in your movie….
does she get excited -
but appropriately hide it?
is she calculating
though,
to your preferred degree?
is she too calm to ever get aggressive?
yet,
too unbothered to ever be possessive?
do you tell her she’s your brightest star?
her words sound like everything?
a more melodious cello, is her heart
you say she’s all you’ve been missing?
does she never overreact?
constantly make you laugh?
a perfect balance -
serious, humorous?
whatever flavor you prefer that day
she would never incite jealousy
that would only push you away?
does she love problems just enough?
and she would never write too much?
are they just as nice,
her eyes?
is it better-timed,
her honest side?
won’t tell her that since you met her,
she’s grown
cause she’s already the best
you’ve ever known
what if
it’s your kiss,
the one i imagine at night
what if i
still can’t bring myself
to let go, to say goodbye?
what if i still daydream?
what then?
what does it mean?
in my head,
together, we are dancing
back when
we were free
back when
we were happy
what if
in my mind
you’re still twirling me
falling in your arms
and into your heart
but yours are open this time
i love you
if only in spirit,
you are here by my side
i miss you, but,
i’ll see you in the next life
